She has gone from being crowned Miss Tembisa in 2014 to being a director of the very same beauty pageant.
When she took over in 2019, her intention was to empower and open up doors of opportunities for the young ladies that follow in her footsteps.
Even when she entered Mrs South Africa, Ratile Mabitsela wanted to show that women are more powerful when they hold each other’s hands.
Ironically, that’s not the same Ratile we get to see in The Mommy Club.
Hopping into an interview with Drum, her sweet voice doesn't sound like someone who’d want to ruffle feathers and be in constant clashes with the other Joburg 'It' mommies.
Telling Drum about the difference in character, she says, “That is Ratile at work. People also need to realise that when we wake up in the morning, we wake up and go to work. When you get to work, there’s some kind of persona that you have to put on to keep up with your nine to five. So, once the camera starts rolling, trust me, every single mommy on The Mommy Club gets into character and the Ratile that you see on screen, is the Ratile that is on set [and at work].”
To justify further, she adds that her everyday life includes being in track pants, running around with her kids and doing school pick-ups and drop offs but that side of her was omitted.
From her introduction on the reality TV show, Ratile stood out as some kind of an outcast. Unlike all the mommies who had an introductory diary session to let people into their lives, she “gatecrashed” Mrs Mops high tea date with the other ladies.
Her Majesty brought her as a plus one, without informing Mrs Mops but the hostility quickly disappeared when Mrs Mops warmed up to her when she got to know her.
Before they all knew it, they were all invited to the Mrs SA pageant finale, but nothing will be coming out of this anymore because the businesswoman has admitted to Drum that she left the competition.
“Two or three weeks into shooting [The Mommy Club], I decided to let go of the pageant [for reasons I cannot disclose because I’m still bound to a non-disclosure agreement with them].”
For someone who is closed off, Ratile did not think she would be in a reality TV show.
Coming into new territory, she says she wanted to challenge herself to do something different and exciting.
“I always live in my own little box, and I have my space to myself. For obvious reasons, my circle is very small and I was like ‘let me just explore, let me tick off the bucket list and see what this can do’. But also, every time I do something, I always look at the bigger picture, what am I gaining? For growth reasons and not for the fun of it.
“Even when I entered Mrs SA, I knew that I was looking for something different, a new platform to reach bigger heights. Trust me, for the [few] months that I was there, by the time I decided that I was leaving, I already got what I wanted,” says the mother of five.
Read More | The Mommy Club’s Nunurai rates Ratile’s event and claps back on being labelled a gossipmonger
Although she’s gotten her way with pageants, not much went her way in the reality TV show. Instead of showing that women can have a good thing going amongst themselves as she intended, the total opposite transpired.
“[I knew that] reality TV is trash and trash TV is nasty [but] since it was a mommy club, I thought it was going to have a different concept only to find that maybe this is the reason why I don’t have friends. You find very superficial people.”
Making reference to some of the mommies including Mrs Mops and Ms Manche who initially met online, she says, “You know, I had no idea that Instagram had the influence that it has. That people build relationships there and actually think those relationships are real.”
The pageant mom adds that she never took a side in that she didn’t go to the reality show to check who’s stronger or bigger so that she can be on their side but always remained in her own lane with no intentions of trying to impress or be in anyone’s good books.
As a child, that’s the very same thing she hated doing – picking sides in relationships and forming friendship groups.
With pageantry, she learned to call a spade a spade and build genuine friendships which she believes was impossible to do because everyone’s alter ego had come out to play.
Read More | Gentle parenting fan Mrs Mops denies The Mommy Club is xenophobic, she sees herself as the ‘big sis’
In the recent episode of the show, she starts crying during a lunch date with Ms Manche who was confronting her for always bringing up her friendship with influencer Kefilwe Mabote.
Mad as Ms Manche was, she calmed down when tears got involved.
Speaking about that moment, she shares that “I am such a crier and I have always been like that, it’s nothing new. I was bullied quite a bit before and I think that’s probably what’s kept me in my shell because the less people around me, the better. When I was with Ms Manche, to a certain extent, I did feel like I was being bullied because why are you inviting me for lunch to come fight me? And I am not a violent person, I’m not going to stoop that low, but it didn’t take away from the fact that I am feeling violated.”
Even as she watched the scene back when it dropped on Tuesday, she says she cried again because the same emotions came back.
Similar to many other turns in the show where Ratile was caught in a clash, she had to apologise.
She admits to Drum that she grew tired of apologising because she got to realise that “people want to show their strengths by being mean to you and expecting you not to say anything.
“Unfortunately, that happened, and I had to stand up for myself.”
