I need to start this piece with a disclaimer - I love all my queens out there, but I have a big problem with the idea of a girlfriend allowance.
I have a question and it goes for men and women. Is the idea of a girlfriend allowance not anti-feminist?
It just puzzles me when people proudly boast about being independent women as Beyonce sings in the background and then turn around and talk about wanting a girlfriend allowance.
This phenomenon is everywhere and you won’t have to look far to experience it. You ever scroll through Tinder and see slogans attached to profiles that read, “(dollar sign emoji) don’t waste my time”, or “princess treatment only”?
That's where it starts.
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I recently had the misfortune of a connection with someone ending, loosely as a result of this antiquated idea.
Let me explain for those who might not have experienced this just yet.
By my understanding, a girlfriend allowance involves sending some money to your queen for her to do with as she pleases, simply because she is your girlfriend. It sounds almost romantic but are we not talking about a dowery of some kind? I may still have to get your parents some cows if our love prevails after all these instalments.
It's a cold world.
This idea is becoming a prerequisite for some people out there and they would sooner wave someone off if they aren’t particularly keen on participating.
You may genuinely have to set up a debit order to be sent off monthly or bi-weekly so as to keep your person romantically interested.
Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with helping your lover out if they maybe need you to borrow them some cash for something or even paying for the person’s Wi-Fi or sending an Uber, all that is cute.
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Even if I had generational wealth, I don't think I could abide by the idea of a girlfriend or spousal allowance even if the amount was a drop in a large ocean. Life is tough out here.
Personally, I am drawn in by the idea of warrior women. If I'm blasting out the window, she would grab the wheel and drive. Dating is a team sport. This thing of asking me to fund your life just because we’re entangled is beyond circumspect.
You think Jay-Z is out there sending money to Beyoncé every month, for what? She has her own. Why do I have to help you get your money up and why is it that I don’t get the same luxury afforded to me? If a heterosexual man asks for a boo allowance, then it’s either he's a sugar baby or seen as inadequate but the other way around is accepted.
Just balance me because it seems to be yet another proudly South African initiative [I stand to be corrected].
If this is going to be a permanent fixture then I can go right ahead and expect a boyfriend allowance when next I get entangled . . . (cash emoji) don’t waste my time, prince treatment only?
