- A fear of offending the stylist is a common reasons why people stay quiet during a bad salon experience.
- Being prepared and calm communication are ways to deal with the anxiety of speaking up to the beautician.
- A woman shares she once undid a style as soon as she got home because it wasn't what she asked for.
It’s that time of the month again where you need to freshen up your hair or treat yourself to a manicure.
You sit down in the salon chair and you notice that the middle part isn’t so centre or the shade of pink the nail technician is applying is giving more Barbie than the pastel you’d asked for.
Do you speak up or suffer in silence?
There’s something intimidating about correcting the hairdresser when one feels their chosen style isn’t being executed in the way they’d like. The beautician knows how to do their job, right?
But, in the same way a restaurant diner can send a meal back to the kitchen if there’s been a mistake, there’s nothing wrong with letting the salon know when your vision isn’t coming to life.
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While this may come easy to some – especially those who have a more extroverted nature – it can be a challenge for others to speak up.
Clinical psychologist Mohube Maswi shares with TRUELOVE why it’s difficult for some to voice their concerns.
“Sometimes people lack the assertiveness to be able to speak up when they are unhappy at the salon. If a person lacks assertiveness in other areas of their lives, they are likely to also struggle in this context. Many people worry a lot about offending the other person or insulting their professional skills.
“Not knowing how to initiate the conversation without being angry or coming across as being [petty]. Some people might experience empathy towards the hairdresser or nail technician and might not want to hurt their feelings by highlighting something negative. A person might also take into consideration the time it took the hairdresser or nail technician to do the job and feel bad that if they speak up then more time will be spent on the same task.”
- Be prepared - always remembering that there is a possibility that you will not like your hairstyle or nails. Mentally preparing ways in which you will best deal with the dissatisfaction.
- Remain calm and polite, it will be easier to be heard if you remain polite.
- Sometimes clients are not clear in what they want from the hairstylist, it is also important to speak clearly when describing what you want done. Do not make assumptions.
- Speak up as soon as you feel uncomfortable or dissatisfied rather that waiting for the stylist to complete the work.
- If you notice once you get home that you do not like the hairstyle, contact the salon and discuss possible solutions.
Akhona, a 34-year-old creative producer, shares how it’s only recently she’s been able to speak up at the salon and explains, “I have been to the hairdresser I think in my youth, and the hairdresser did something quite crazy to my hair and I wasn’t happy and I went home and I took it off.
"Then, in that moment I realised I wasn’t serving anybody because that lady left my space thinking she had done something I was really happy about but I was not happy. So, [what] I learnt in that moment is that actually when I don’t voice how I feel or what I think in the moment, I’m actually doing a disservice to not just myself but to the other person as well.”
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Nxalati, 29, knows how her natural hair works and stays clear from gel but an experience submitting to a new hairdresser insisting to install her braids with gel left disastrous results.
“I let her do it and I think I kept it in for a week, right, and it was so painful the entire time that I had it to the point where I thought it would relax and it didn’t,” she explains.
“When I took it out after just a week, I had a huge lump on my head because my scalp was swelling because of the tightness, there was no letting go. Oh my gosh, it was the most painful thing … And when I tried to tell her about it, she kept on telling me it’s probably the way I’m looking after it and I feel like that’s a lot of the time the problem in South Africa, we have so many unlicensed hairdressers.”
Others are willing to say then and there when the style is not coming out as planned, much like Winnie, a 26-year-old media analyst.
She shares, “I’m a Sagittarius so, girl, I speak up every time! … I must say with hair, obviously, you never know until the final look but if I’m getting braids done, I always check to see whether I like the thickness or not and if I don’t like the thickness I’ll speak up and say. But I must say, in terms of dealing with my natural hair, that’s when I’m always scared to speak up.
“A lot of people don’t know how to deal with natural hair so I’m just like ugh whatever like maybe in terms of using heat or in terms of what products to use, I just don’t really speak up with that, so I’d say that’s one thing I don’t speak up with. But in general, honestly, I think I have the courage because my mom always used to speak up when my hair wasn’t done right. So, she’d be like, ‘Nah, this ain’t giving’.”
