When Malania 'Rainbow' Banda saw a good-looking guy with a style that compliments her fashion sense a few years ago, it was so hard to resist when they finally got a chance to sit down together.
Malania is bisexual and she wanted to enjoy the best of both worlds by having a boyfriend and girlfriend at the same time.
Speaking to TRUELOVE, the 29-year-old reality TV star says she never compromised on how she feels to fit the norms. That’s why she did not hide her sexuality from her boyfriend, Thabang Thobejane, from the get-go.
She says they made being open and adventurous the centre of their relationship. So, when they heard that there is a new and edgy dating show on Dstv’s Mzansi Magic, S’jola Sonke – where couples have an opportunity to each other, they never looked back and auditioned because it was their reality.
Every week on Sundays after an episode of S’jola Sonke is aired, the couple becomes the hot topic.
Thabang, who is known as Test, tells us that they’ve always been experimenting with the idea of being a throuple even before they made it into the show.
“Before the show, it was more about being intimate with the girls not sexually though, but we would go to the club kissing other girls. So, the relationship mission [in the show] was to have a third person who is going to be like a friend and girlfriend at the same time,” he shares.
He tells us that his relationship with Rainbow, real name, Malania, is eight years old. He tells TRUELOVE that it did not come as a shock when Malania came out to him. In fact, it was music to his ears.
“I am an open-minded guy. My best friend is gay, so I understood where she came from. When she told me I was like ‘Okay cool this is awesome, I like it, you love chicks I love chicks, so this is great let’s do it.’”
As time went by, the moment of living their truth finally arrived.
“We started to bring it up like ‘what would happen if we introduced a second girlfriend in the picture?’ not like in the format of isithembu [polygamy] but more of an adventurous journey that we go on and see if it is love if it is indeed possible to love more than one person at the same time; is it possible to bring another person into the relationship without affecting the love that is already there,” says Thabang.
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He says the only rule that he had was that Rainbow must not bring another guy into their relationship because he is not gay.
“Being in a throuple means all the three of us are dating, so it is three of us in a relationship, meaning Rainbow can have quality time with the other partner, and I can also have quality time with them too. We can all three be together so it is like a three-way relationship – Rainbow and I can both engage with the person. They are no rules except that it must be a girl because I am not into guys.”
He says what excites him the most about being in a throuple is the fact that he gets to have two girls from both his left and right arms. However, there is a checklist – it is not random, he says.
“I mean it is always music for me to agree on a girl that we like, so it is always going to be like ‘did we like her at first glance? Sure, does she have the personality that we like? Sure. If all those boxes tick, we can take it from there. But I am a guy, so I am not going to complain. I mean I already feel good about having a girlfriend who wants to have a girlfriend. It is all about personality etc. If she finds her [Rainbow] attractive, I always find the [other] girl attractive because Rainbow knows me.”
He tells us that after his girlfriend has introduced the other girl in their relationship, they start hanging out and talking with each other more often so that feelings can be developed.
“We handle it in a very mature way because we are dealing with people’s feelings. We don’t want to go and give away our spirit just like that.”
Who is approaching who? We ask, “We both go,” he answers, “If I meet someone, I can bring them to the picture.”
He adds, “We have already met someone, and I have introduced her to my Rainbow, and she likes her. It is someone that we have both known for like three years now, but she only finds out about our three-way relationship now. She is happy and very much interested because we have been close for a long time, she loves Rainbow [Malania].”
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Malania jumps in and tells us she is embracing who she is and does not wish to fit into any societal box. She says she is her icon and will always put her happiness first.
“It has been a journey for me and Thabang, you know being with someone who is straight as a bisexual girl, was not easy. I’ve always wanted to be myself and not be stuck in the norm where it is one person, one person. It has been a phenomenal journey though Oh My God!”
“I am a strong believer in my emotions, in who I am and in allowing people to know who I am. So, as much as my family could see because I was dating a girl and they’d get furious, I was like ‘You not going to stop me, the only way to stop me is if you kill me’ you know, so I was just me and I did not want to take no for answer,” she says.
Malania starts clearing her throat a bit when she speaks about how they are head over heels in love as a throuple.
“Darling, the new person is going haha, everything is just so amazing. What I love the most about her is that we have the same characteristics, we get along well with each other. We are on the same level and path. We also have room for growth, and our partner [Thabang] doesn’t mind the growth.”
To avoid spoilers, Malania says she doesn’t wish to give away too much but will have to watch the rest of the show to see how their journey ends.
