'I have suffered GBV intensely' — Bujy Bikwa on why he joined a gender-based violence walk

In a few weeks, he'll be back at court to face the music. He was arrested and charged with assault after an altercation with media personality Boity Thulo (31) where he threw a glass at her.

He was released on R2 000 bail. Meanwhile, radio and tv personality Bujy Bikwa (33) is participating in a 5km walk against gender-based violence.

The Queer Way Of Life presenter has since joined the Khuzekani Madoda organisation and will be participating in an anti-gender-based violence 5km walk in November 2021. The walk aims to raise awareness around gender-based violence.  

Why? South Africans have asked, especially considering that he's still facing assault charges. Some have even called it a walk of shame. 

“Why is this even a question? Why not participate. Why sit back and fold my arms? I am part of this because there is a need for GBV to stop. Violence is not only physical but also verbal or emotional. We need to start checking ourselves as a nation to see if we are handling this,” he says.  

Bujy tells Drum he joined the march to help people identify and understand what GBV really means. 

“Violence is not the way to go, after spending seven days in Sun City prison as a gay man, I realised that is not where I belong. I urge people to not choose violence in any situation, but rather walk away.” 

He has been questioned for participating n the march after he demonstrated violence during the altercation with Boity. 

“We need to stop dehumanising other people and making them feel less.”  

Bujy says he has been a facilitator at Youth Camps and has been teaching young people about GBV “In most cases, people do not understand GBV and how to identify it immediately. I teach them how to identify when someone is trying to humiliate you because of your gender.”

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Bujy believes he was a victim of GBV on the night of the incident with Boity.

“I got put on the walk because I am for saying no to GBV. I have suffered GBV intensely.”  

He says his past experiences of being abused have broken him. 

“My personal experience with GVB started when I was young, being exposed to it. Seeing domestic violence daily. Growing up and it done to me and believing that the older I get it gets better, but it just got worse,” he says.  

“I have constantly been made to feel inferior and told to take the verbal abuse and physical abuse because I’m a man. Also learning that you cannot trust anyone. When you go to the police station, you’re told you’re a man, and as a gay man being told you’re gay. We are told to take harsh words because you’re a man.” 

He has come under fire and called a hypocrite for being part of the anti GBV walk. 

“The criticism makes me sad. No one knows what happened that night, they just know one side of the story. The case the lady opened was not based on GBV. My counter case against her is a GBV case,” he adds. 

“I am being vilified to the core. It works because I am a man. No one understands what happened. There’s so much that happened on the day and when I break it down, it will all make sense.”

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Bujy fears that on the day of the walk, people may try to harm him. 

“I do fear for my life. I have been brutally attacked on social media and so many media platforms. People have written things they are not sure about,” he says.  

“I fear for my livelihood as well. The day is all about no violence and that platform is not to try and emotionally or verbally abuse me. But what people can learn from this is, GBV can happen to anyone. It is female-dominated but it can happen to men and women. GBV hurts the most when you’re being silenced, and you are not heard because you’re a man and you should take it needs to stop."