MEN should stop abusing women and children.
This is a call from members of Father A Nation in support of the global movement of 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children.
The awareness kicked off on Saturday, 25 November and will run until Sunday, 10 December.
The organisation is out to advocate for no violence for all.
Graig Wilkinson, the founder and CEO of Father A Nation - a non-profit company (NPC), said no boy is born an abuser, and gender-based violence (GBV) can be eradicated before it starts.
He said their organisation has been hosting events to encourage men to stop the abuse in their families.
Graig said GBV can be stopped in its tracks by teaching, inspiring and healing men.
“We work throughout South Africa with boys and men at schools, universities, communities, and organisations in both the public and private sectors.
"We meet these men where they are at, from taverns to corporations and sports fields," said Graig.
He said more than 300 000 men have gone through their programmes over the past 10 years, either through soccer tournaments, tavern conversations, dialogues, or workshops in communities and camps.
ALSO READ - 'My father made me his wife'
Graig said the sessions always produce lively debates and rich, authentic personal stories of both struggle and triumph.
"The engagements are highly effective in helping men to understand what GBV is, examine their own lives, and provide them with the knowledge and motivation to turn their lives around.
"Healthy masculinity never abuses. Our philosophy at the organisation is that if we can heal men, we can heal the world. We focus on working with men to become excellent fathers, mentors, role models, and just good men," said Graig.
He said the solution to GBV is to stop it in its tracks, and men are the primary perpetrators of physical and sexual GBV.
"It’s critical to create awareness and support victims. Ideally, we don't want victims at all and the way to stop that from happening is to stop wounded men from being abusive," said Craig.
Mzwakhe Madonsela, who attended the forum, said men should seek help and stop abusing their wives and children.
Mzwakhe (47) from Protea South in Soweto said when he grew up his father used to assault his mother.
"I also followed on my father's bad behaviour and used to assault my partner. She would open cases against me and later withdraw them to protect me.
"We ended up separating with the mother of my children," he said.
Mzwakhe said through the initiative of the organisation, he had learnt to control his anger.
"We meet once a week with other men and discuss issues that affect us and also encourage each other to protect women," he said.
He said their wish is to raise boys to be better men.
"GBV is rife in our community. Recently I tried to warn a boy who was assaulting his girlfriend on the street. But to my surprise, the mother of the boy came out and insulted me, telling me to mind my own business. I felt bad about it, because I knew the boy would continue with this kind of behaviour when he grows up which could lead him to turn into a monster," said Mzwakhe.
Another man said he turned into a monster at his home.
"I used to assault my wife in front of my children, and this affected everyone.
"When I arrived at home, I would hear my wife and children talking and laughing loudly, but when I open the door, they would run to their rooms or stop talking," he said.
He said that's how he destroyed his family leading to a divorce that left him stranded.
He said he attended the camps organised by the organisation and his life has changed for the better.
"I'd like to advise men who abuse their wives and children to seek help," he said.
