Clare Oke-Smith Credit: Array.
Former mistress who now regrets wrecking a marriage is now sharing all the ways she noticed her lover was behaving while trying to woo her and cover up his affair to his wife.
The 29-year-old Clare Oke-Smith SAYS SHE still suffers terrible shame for letting herself be “duped” into an affair with a married.
Speaking to The Sun, she hated the thought that she would become a mistress and hates the idea of taking another woman’s husband.
Clare is now sharing the10 ways she noticed her lover was behaving while trying to woo her and cover up his affair to his wife.
“I believe men cheat because they reach a stage where they wonder if that is all there is and want to test their manhood.”
“It’s a cliche, but it’s often part of a mid-life crisis — they think they will regain their youth by bedding a younger woman.
“I think married men often search for women who seem vulnerable, because this makes them more susceptible to their charm.
“Often they are going through a period of stress or even depression, and feel they need to bring excitement into their life.” She told the sun team.
Here are the 10 signs that your man is cheating or trying
1. LATE NIGHTS
A big pointer is if your partner is staying up well after you have gone to bed.
It’s easy to FaceTime or Skype a lover in the early hours, while the family is safely asleep in bed.
2. MYSTERY SPENDING
If your other half has taken out a new credit card without mentioning it to you, this is a red flag.
Look out for the bills arriving which are immediately spirited away.
Or if you see new plastic appear in his wallet keep your wits about you – it may have an online statement you can’t see.
Likewise, another big clue is mysterious big-money purchases appearing on bank statements.
If he wasn’t with you splashing the cash, the question is: who was he with?
3. CHANGING TASTES
If your beau is suddenly interested in new music and downloading tunes from bands he had never heard of before, be alert.
This influence may be coming from someone whose opinion he values, and who he is desperate to impress.
4. TECH SECRECY
If your other half hides their phone or laptop from you, or locks it with a new code this may be cause for concern.
I learned from overhearing calls that when a person is lying they have very little time to make up a story.
Sarcasm is one way to bluster through explanations. Wise-crack answers may mean you are being lied to.
6. MORE TIME BEING SPENT WITH FEMALE CO-WORKER
Spending more time than usual with a woman from work, chatting to her online or arranging work trips in which she is always a part, is a red flag.
This is how my lover covered up many of his liaisons with me.
7. NEW MANNERISMS
Using new phrases, trendy slang or mannerisms is a big clue.
If they’re spending time with a younger woman they’ll subconsciously pick up many on-trend expressions they never used before.
8. BECOMING A PEACOCK
Taking more pride in their appearance, buying new clothes, dieting or becoming very keen on visiting the gym is a classic sign of philandering.
They thought they were good enough for you before, so why are they having doubts now?
Could there be someone want to impress?
9. SEX LIFE LOSING ITS SPARKLE
Most men, no matter how duplicitous, find it hard to sleep with two women at the same time.
It takes an awful lot of energy and planning so your love life will suffer if you are living with a cheat.
10. EMOTIONAL DISTANCE
If his eye is wandering your partner may stop letting you in on their plans, or being evasive about things like booking holidays or days out.