Dear MizzB

MY husband always wants to have sex and I don’t like it.

I’m never in the mood for sex and he doesn’t seem to understand when I tell him I’m not interested.

I’m even thinking of telling him to find a sex partner so he can stop wanting to poke me. Am I right to have such thoughts?

- Stressed

Dear Stressed

You sound like you don’t enjoy having sex with your husband.

Our first sexual experiences are very influential on how we understand intimacy and our sexuality. The way we socialise as girls and boys shapes the way we look at sex when we are adults.

This may cause us to have negative feelings towards it, making it an act of “duty”, rather than of love or enjoyment. Suggesting that your husband find someone to sleep with could lead him to create a bond with her and lose interest in you. Rather seek assistance from a marriage counsellor to determine the cause of your lack of interest in sex.

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