4 months ago
DON’T RUSH, ENJOY THE FOREPLAY!
South African journalist and television presenter Kuli Roberts. Photo: Gallo Images/The times/Daniel Born  ~ 

I AM not sure what cheap drugs my man is on and I am concerned.

I had to endure a weekend of no sex during our last getaway, all because he read some manual on treating women.

According to him, he is not with me for my body and wanted to prove that by denying me carnal pleasure for what seemed like a month.

At first, I thought he was joking as I’m looking hot.

Banging!

I assumed he would reach out for me and envelop me in his arms as I walked to him in my nakedness and asked him the time.

I wasn’t wearing a watch.

My apple-sized breasts with perky nipples did nothing for him.

Even my dance with a lone feather just seemed to give him indigestion, so I gave up on day one.

Surely, it was still an enjoyable weekend even if he didn’t make me scream.

It was amazing as we were together, but it’s suggested, and encouraged and okay if he wants me for my body.

Damn!

Especially on trips.

There’s nothing wrong with being wanted for your body!

Stop reading books written by women who hate men and don’t experience lust, love or passion.

This is what every man should know, as well as the following:

Unless a girl fancies anal sex, she won’t offer it.
Ensure your mates are with you and your blind date – some women are known to claim rape.
Never accept lifts from strangers you’re not paying, even if her breasts are protruding out of her top.
Stay home, be faithful – and live long.
Don’t sexually harass female staff with unnecessary hugs – do you want your daughter groped by an old guy like you? STOP.
Sex is important, lads. Some women lie when they say we hate it. Ignore their books.
Sex is a dance which must be prepared for, so enjoy the foreplay and don’t rush.
Your woman is your mate, but not one of the boys – so never forget to surprise her with gifts.
Women are easy and just want you to love them with respect. They don’t want to be deprived of sex.
Never assume your lady doesn’t want to ride you like a pony.
Never believe the nonsense that women have a lower sex drive and don’t want it often.
Most women love sex and want to be respected because our brain has nothing to do with our ability to make you beg for more.
Never, ever, resort to asking the local party girl to send you a punani selfie. Eat at home!

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